I am what I am! – By Rubin van Niekerk

During long time periods over centuries and even millennia, the freedom to bond or love somebody of the same sex was remarkably relaxed and same-sex love and bromance was often accepted by mainstream society.

Depending on the era the degree to which this love could be expressed varied. I guess Oscar Wilde became an incredible pioneer when he loved another man of high standing openly and wrote wonderful satires about the rather pompous and unenlightened wealthy Victorian society.

This beautiful expression about, “the love that dare not speak its name”, penned in September 1892 by Lord Alfred Douglas and published in 1894 in the Oxford magazine, The Chameleon became one of the most well-known quotes in the English-speaking world. Oscar Wilde also blew life into it that expression which became one of the most well-known quotes in the English-speaking world and it remains as well known today as more than a century ago. We live in an archival word where famous writing remains well researched and documented by academics irrespective of the time frame. Few of us realise that Oscar Wilde, our literary giant, only lived to forty-six and died in poverty about three years after being released from jail for his homosexual sins.

His razor-sharp-witted satirical life that questioned homophobia and hypocrisy will never be forgotten and is still studied by scholars globally. His scandalous love affair when he met “Bosie”, Lord Douglas who was twenty-one and a gifted Oxford undergraduate, while Wilde was a great Irish poet and father of two sons, fuelled a viral prejudicial fire. In 1895 Oscar Wilde was jailed for two years for his forbidden love and sadly died too soon.

Throughout history we encounter many famous gay people who changed history, like Leonardi Da Vinci, Michaelangelo, Julius Caesar, Alexander the Great, Isaac Newton, Virginia Woolf, Alan Turing, Nicola Tesla, Josephine Baker, Gore Vidal, Andy Warhol, Harvey Milk, Divine, the “Drag Queen of the Century” (Harris Glen Milstead), Freddy Mercury, Gilbert Baker the inventor of our iconic rainbow flag and Elton John who generously donates hundreds of millions of dollars to organisations annually that are supportive of gay men’s health. These few iconic figures like so many unnamed others had a powerful impact on the world’s history as they could not be bothered by narrow societal conventions for which we owe them a lot. Alan Turing, the father of modern computer science and the code breaker of the Enigma cypher machine, which tracked the German Navy, guaranteed a victory for the Allied Forces that were taking a massive beating even though they outnumbered the German Forces that were technologically more advanced. Repulsively, Alan Turing a polymath and the father of the modern computer never received credit in his lifetime which ended in suicide at forty-two following chemical castration for loving a man.

We who have had it so easy for the past thirty years in enlightened societies must never forget that the world is a rather primitive place dominated by narrow minded people who will persecute us and bully us when we are at our most vulnerable, whether young or old.

The political swing to the right globally targets us in the nastiest of ways just like it has always done previously during previous tunnel visioned historical periods. I came out in my teens in the eighties and fondly remember the great sense of camaraderie that we shared. All of us had shared awful experiences of bullying and hardship that came from all quarters including some of our families – the very people who should love us and keep us safe. This affected anybody from teenagers to university students, to pensioners being forced back into the closet. Speak to gay people at old age homes and they will tell you they are generally cautious and keep a low profile. Please step up and create safe spaces for yourself long before you are too old to have the resources or the energy to so. We have tried hard for ten years to encourage South African society to see the benefits of living freely as we are, no matter our race, sexual persuasion or religious beliefs. No society has the right to take that away from us. No wonder that one of the most loved gay anthems is Gloria Gaynor’s, I am what I am, is a perfect ideal that we must fight for no matter the cost.

Communal threats bond us whereas where some societies became more tolerant, we often started losing our sense of rebellion and camaraderie. Maybe this renewed right wing threat will revive our gay renaissance to fight for our gay rights in a Trumpist era that is spreading. The economic conflict that it spawns guarantee a short-lived fantasy of dominance. Hitler’s thousand-year Reich lasted ten years which is 1% of what was believed by most fanatical Germans. It may have survived longer if it was not for an openly gay man, Alan Turing, the father of the modern computer who outwitted the Germans. In an information era it is hard to pull the wool over people’s eyes for long.

Many of the ‘80s generation are still passionate activists who fondly remember the great solidarity and sense of purpose we experienced fighting homophobia on all fronts. A few years ago, we saw that gay and LGBTQI+ rights in general, that we fought so hard for, for so long, appeared to start losing traction in fascist countries as well as countries that pretended to be libertarian countries like the USA. We must never forget how free society was in Berlin from them 1880s to the early 1930s. Poverty caused by the debt of the first world war and the Great Depression searched for new scapegoats and the Jews, gays and intellectuals made perfect targets for the ‘30s Nazi regime that gained popularity with promises of “lebensraum”, jobs and making Germany great again. Sounds, rather familiar don’t you think?

I think these renewed attacks on our rights to live freely as equals will revive our camaraderie, and it is time to spend our hard-earned pink money where our custom is embraced with more than lip service. Many corporates are back pedalling, and I think we should pay attention who they are and remove our support of their products. The latest research on LGBTQI questionnaires aimed at teens have stunned analysts with more than 30% of teens identifying as LGBTQI. Alienating such a large chunk of the population is a high price to pay by those who fan homophobia. Countries who are tolerant of human rights usually have economies that excel, and they also consistently attract well educated and skilled high earners who contribute to the ficus consistently. One thing is certain, we will have to fight, and fight like hell if we are to have any rights at all.

This article originally appeared in Gay Pages Edition 3 of 2024